and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
