i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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