I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
My balls are so social today.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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