operation have a gay friend backfired
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Randomize
