I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize