I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
