we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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