Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
