I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Randomize
