Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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