Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize