I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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