I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
