why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
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She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
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Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
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