Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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