My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
