If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
