So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
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