Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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