worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Randomize
