i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Randomize
