So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.