Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
