his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
