i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
