We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Randomize
