is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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