I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
