Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
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