he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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