I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
