So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Randomize