I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
