I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
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