I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
