The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
