I hope mine doesn't look like that
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Randomize
