nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
