He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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