**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
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