yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
