Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
...so i touched it.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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