just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
