You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
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Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize