i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
