What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Randomize