Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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