no, he came in my armpit
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Randomize