I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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