nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
